Tag Archives: stress

The Problem With the Word “Should”

The word “should” may be one of the most hazardous words in the life of a brain injury survivor.  It tends to appear in sentences such as “I should be walking already” or “I should have been back at my job by now.”  The word confers a tremendous degree of expectation on the survivor and implies that somehow the survivor is a failure if he or she has not achieved what he or she “should” have achieved.  Often, this word sparks a cascade of statements by which survivors verbally punish themselves.  “I should have been able to walk without a wheelchair but I instead I fell.  I should be doing better with my mobility.  I am letting down my whole family!”  These “should” statements can easily lead to depression, stress and damaged self-esteem.

The reality is that each brain injury heals at its own rate and as a result each survivor is left with his or her own unique set of challenges.  After a serious brain injury, it often takes a survivor considerably longer than he or she may expect to reach goals due to the severity of the injury suffered.  An injured brain is not like a broken arm.  You cannot put a brain in a cast as you would put an arm, expecting that in a relatively brief period of time the brain will be healed.  Brain injury rehabilitation is a process that takes time and patience.  The only applicable “should” enters into consideration in emphasizing that the survivor should dedicate full effort to his or her therapies.  That is all anyone, including the survivor, can reasonably ask for.  As long as the survivor is giving his or her best effort, the survivor is doing everything in his or her power to get better.  The rest of the process will depend on time, the practicing and learning of new skills and how the survivor’s individul brain heals following a specific injury.  Recovery cannot be rushed or forced.  “Should” statements that imply that somehow recovery ought to have gone differently are thus plainly revealed as emotional snares best avoided.

 

Learn about brain injury treatment services at the Transitional Learning Center: http://tlcrehab.org/

 

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Fatigue

It is common for brain injury survivors to suffer fatigue more acutely and to enter into states of fatigue more easily after their injuries.  For many survivors and their family members, this increase in fatigue comes as a bit of a surprise.  Why am I (or my loved one) exhausted by 6 p.m. when I (or my loved one) used to be active throughout the evening even after a long day of work?
Below are just a few of the reasons why brain injury survivors may be experiencing this greater post-injury fatigue:

 
1.  Survivors may still be healing from the injury.
2.  It often takes far more effort and concentration to engage in basic activities like walking and speaking than it did pre-injury.
3.  Survivors are almost always operating under far greater levels of stress than before.  This could be due to the inevitable stress of trying to get better or stress from other issues such as financial difficulties due to losing a job after an  injury.
4.  They may be experiencing significant post-injury pain and prolonged pain tends to contribute to fatigue.
5.  The survivors’ medications may be causing fatigue.
6.  The survivors may not be sleeping as well due to the injury.  Many brain injury survivors experience significant changes to sleep patterns post-injury.
7.  The survivors may be feeling depressed, anxious or angry. Any of these emotional states are conducive to greater fatigue.
8.  They might still be getting used to the “rehab” or “post-injury” schedule, which may be quite different from their pre-injury schedules.  For instance, a night shift worker may find that it takes some time to get used to the daytime hours of rehabilitation.
9.  The greater fatigue may simply be part of the brain injury itself.

 
Depending on the cause of the fatigue effecting each individual survivor, brain injury professionals may manage given circumstances in very different ways.  For instance, if it’s determined that a survivor is suffering fatigue due to depression, then the survivor would be encouraged to talk about those issues with a staff psychotherapist.  If fatigue is most likely attributable to medication being taken, a staff doctor may make adjustments to those medications.  If fatigue is due to to the added exertion of engaging in daily tasks, survivors may be encouraged to take appropriate rest breaks.  In all cases, patience and understanding go a long way to helping the survivor cope with fatigue.

Learn about brain injury treatment services at the Transitional Learning Center: tlcrehab.org